A time to grow…

Over the past week, I’ve been thinking a lot about growth. About the determination it takes to inch forward all the time, ever slowly moving to places where there are always new and exciting possibilities on the horizon.

 

These thoughts, I have to admit, were largely inspired by watching both my daughters graduate college this week.

 

In doing so both finished top of their class and were awarded prizes by their respective colleges and it is difficult to put into words the feeling of pride in what they have achieved.

 

But I also know that these accomplishments came through sheer hard work and determination on their part.

 

The realisation that the pursuit of excellence is an ongoing experience that means a person must be prepared to sacrifice easier options to stay on the path to success.

 

The uncanny wisdom of Aesop’s fables summed it up perfectly in the story of the goose and the golden egg.

 

That story tells of a farmer who finds a shiny, glittering yellow egg in the nest of the goose and at first is convinced it must be some trick and is ready to throw it away.

 

But he stops for a second, thinks and then takes it home to discover to his delight that it is indeed made of gold. Each day he gathers an egg from the nest of the goose and becomes rich beyond his wildest dreams – but then greed and impatience sets in.

 

Thinking he can get all the gold the goose can offer at once, he kills the goose and opens her to find nothing.

 

What that story tells us is that growth is an ongoing journey of ups and downs, successes and failures, opportunities, progress and change.

 

To think that it can all be attained in one fell swoop is wrong and can result in losing the fortune amassed through the daily activities that make up the process of growing.

 

I once read somewhere that the largest room in the world, is the room for improvement and I am convinced that in realising that, you learn to always strive for better.

 

In his book ‘Peak Performers’ Charles Garfield wrote:

 

“Searching for the peak performer within yourself has one basic meaning: You recognise yourself as a person who was born, not as a peak performer, but as a learner. With the capacity to grow, change and reach for the highest possibilities of human nature, you regard yourself as a person in process.”

 

Watching my daughters move onward in their life journey, reminded me though that we are all on our own journey still and we all have the potential to continue growing.

 

We are accountable for our own lives, responsible for what we are now, where we want to go and what we will become – because ultimately, everything – peace of mind, well-being, happiness and growth will came as a result of our own decisions.

 

It’s up to us to choose wisely. And when we don’t – to learn from those mistakes and go again.

 

 

I Wish For You

 

I wish for you

never to be afraid

to stay on the road

that lets you

follow your dreams.

 

To set your sights high

and to take whatever

chances you need

to get there.

 

To take flight

filled with desire

daring and determination.

 

And to keep that.

 

Always.

 

 

Why encouragement is important…

On the night I launched my book Dance in the Rain a few years ago now, I was handed a copy of my book and asked to write some words of encouragement as a special dedication for someone I had never met.

The person who asked me to do that, gave me some background and inspired by the words I heard that night when Jason Black spoke to launch my book, I wrote the poem “Chase your Dreams’ as that dedication.

I was thinking a lot about encouragement this week and the ripple effect it can have, not least because unknown to me, my daughter had chosen to recite that poem at an awards ceremony during the week.

To be honest I was so choked up with emotion that she would choose to do that, I never actually asked her why she had chosen it, but there is part of me hoping that it was because she and her sister have always been urged by myself and their mother to indeed beware of the dream stealers and to go ahead and follow their dreams.

It might seem like a little thing, but I genuinely believe that encouragement – showing belief in others – is such a vital part of making life better for everyone.

Socrates once said: “I cannot teach you anything, I can only make you think,” and if we can help make people think better of themselves, then surely we are doing good?

The older I get, the more I genuinely believe that we should measure our success by our ability to create an environment that brings out the best in people.

With that in mind I was chuffed to read the opening lines of an interview in the Sunday Independent Magazine with my friend Maria Rushe who writes the S-Mum blog.

In those opening lines, Maria recalls a conversation with me from a few years back when she revealed to me her burning desire to write – and I encouraged her to go ahead and do it.

Since then, Maria has not only started a blog that has grown at a phenomenal rate – but she has even scooped a national title for best parenting blog in the past fortnight.

I am in no way claiming any kind of credit for Maria’s success – but rather I am delighted to rejoice in her achievements, knowing full well that any few words of encouragement I might have offered at that time, she has returned to me tenfold or more over the past number of years.

It’s often been suggested that people need to surround themselves with good people, but in doing so I believe that it’s important to be both a giver and a receiver.

You need to ask of yourself – “Do I bring people up? Do I compliment them, assure them, give encouragement to their talents? Do I try to stimulate them to make the best possible use of their potential abilities?”

As someone who spends time coaching youngsters, these are questions I ask of myself often, realising from my own experience that a lot of people have gone further in life and done more than they might have expected – because somebody else believed that they could.

Encouragement means to give courage. It gives the strength that people need to beat the dream stealers and follow their dreams.

Encouragers rejoice in the accomplishments and happiness of others, because they understand that the power of praise is limited only by its lack of use.

And they know that compliments and words of encouragement can help dreams and ambitions become a reality….