Pursuing the unfamiliar…

There was a point at the weekend, as I sat watching the television show ‘Strictly Come Dancing,’ that made me realise how important it should be for all of us, to be open to the idea of pursuing the unfamiliar.

A few years ago, I was unfamiliar with that television show – in the sense that, while I knew it existed, I had never watched it or knew what it was about.

Had I done so, had I known what was involved, it is very likely that I would never have agreed to have taken part in the strictly fund raiser for the local school. And that would have meant I missed out on a huge milestone for me.

By that I mean the fact that, despite my deep reservations about my total inability to do it – I did it anyway – and in doing so began to understand that we enjoy life more if we expose ourselves to the unfamiliar.

Many people – and yes I am still among them – get in the habit of saying no to new experiences. But that far too often leaves us in a comfort zone that restricts our growth.

Sometimes we do so because of the self-limitations we have set for ourselves.

Instead of having chosen to stay where we are, we have actually just settled for what we are – and in doing so we often leave so much potential untapped, undiscovered.

Mark Twain who espoused the idea of getting out of the comfort zone when he said “Do something every day that you don’t want to do,” also told this great story of unfulfilled potential.

A man who was interested in military history, died and went to heaven where he was met at the gates by St. Peter.

Deciding he would make the most of the opportunity, the man explained his fascination for all things military and asked St. Peter if he could let him know who was the greatest general of all time?

“That’s easy,” St. Peter replied, pointing nearby, ‘it’s that man over there.”

“I think you are mistaken,” the first man said to St. Peter. “I knew that man you have pointed to on earth, he was just a common labourer.”

“That’s correct,” St. Peter answered, ‘but he would have been the greatest general of all time…if he had been a general.”

It’s important to understand that we should never short change our potential.

Those who stand out from the crowd have learned that all development is self-development. Growth is an individual project and the crowd will often stand back to let a winner through.

My strictly experience highlighted that I’d never be the greatest dancer of all time, but far more importantly it reminded me that only in action do we ever learn and grow.

It is not enough to have desire, it is not enough even to prepare, because unless they are followed up with the responsibility to take action, they are, on their own worthless.

The power to grow, to expand our horizon, to step outside our comfort zone is ours to act upon.

That’s as long as we can eliminate our self-imposed limitations, address inhibitors and excuses and make changes in our habits so we can break through mediocrity.

We need to stretch ourselves each day to accomplish more than the day before.

To understand that the commitment to having a better tomorrow, will always start today…

OUT OF THE STORM

There will always be

more storms to weather,

opportunities to hide,

to keep the head

below the parapet

until it seems

a perfect time has come,

to peek out from your fears,

hoping that just maybe,

the worst of the tempest

has passed you by.

But those storms can also

offer exciting new prospects.

Chances to show strength;

the fortitude to keep focus

on the glimmers of brightness

however far, on the horizon.

The choice to tough it out,

to shake off obstacles and pain.

To step out from the shadow

of those raging storms,

and learn to dance in the rain…

 

Running in the wrong direction

I got to spend a lot of time last week around many inspirational and motivational people and I realised that one of the reasons I find so many of them such an inspiration, is that they are not afraid to question.

 

By that I mean, that even though they will be driven by wanting the very best for you, these are people who will not just cheer your efforts for the sake of it – they will help you question what you are doing, why you are doing it and how you are doing it?

 

I have written many times about how important it is to encourage effort.

 

To keep people motivated and help them find a sense of confidence, but if they are to really succeed, it is also vital to question process.

 

To ask questions – to make them stop and check if they are on the right path for growth?

 

In conversation with a sports coach recently, he suggested that young sports participants are often so fuelled by the gratification they receive from the sidelines from well-meaning supporters, that everything they’ve been learning from their coaches often gets ignored.

 

“Compliments are great in the right circumstances, but they are like crisps, once you’ve had a taste of one, you’ll look for more,” he said.

 

So, when a kid repeatedly receives praise for what a coach recognises as poor technique, it’s easier for that child to continue to seek the praise than to work hard with the coach’s guidance to rectify the problem.

 

In business, something similar often manifests itself in a sense of belief in an idea by well-intentioned friends or family who either lack the knowledge to make the right call, or who simply don’t want to offend.

 

In the mistaken belief that critical thinking is criticism, people who could be helpful are afraid to offend. Instead, they take the option of cheering on the idea without offering any real and meaningful assistance.

 

After all, it’s easy to do that from the sidelines.

 

It always reminds me of the story of the famous tightrope walker Zumbrati who walked across Niagara Falls on a day when conditions were less than ideal.

 

Among those who came to congratulate him was a man with a wheelbarrow who loudly proclaimed his belief that Zumbrati could walk that wire wheeling the wheelbarrow across.

 

Knowing his limitations and feeling fortunate to have completed the feat he just had, Zumbrati shook his head and said no, but the man insisted.

 

Eventually Zumbrati yielded.

 

“You really do believe in me,” he said to the man, who instantly replied, “yes, I do.”

 

To which Zumbrati said: “Then, get into the wheelbarrow.”

 

You see, it’s easy to be a cheerleader from the sidelines, but when you’ve got skin in the game you might begin to question things differently.

 

And there is no reason that you can not do that anyway.

 

Those amazing inspirational people I spent time with last week do it all the time.

 

They give encouragement to the talents they see in others. They compliment them, assure them, they stimulate them to make the best use of their potential abilities.

 

And more often than not they do that, not by cheering blindly at all they do, but by very nicely making them question what they are doing and how they can do it better…

 

Wrong way round

All they heard were cheers.

You can do it. You are great.

So they kept on going.

That was their fuel.

Never once hearing

the call to turn around.

They kept on running.

In the wrong direction.

(Liam Porter 2019)